Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Shrinking Family


Here's Category 5 John M. and his Paw-Paw PJ (Mark's dad). Are they a cute couple?

This picture, combined with the holiday season, has started me thinking about how our family is shrinking. Mostly on my side, I guess, not Mark's. Mark's brother just got married so I guess his family actually grew instead. (Hi Emily, we love ya!).

In the past 3 years, my family has had many losses. My dad a year and a half ago, my paternal grandmother almost 2 years ago, and my maternal grandmother the year before. Our family has always been small anyway (my dad was an only child and my mom only has one brother who lives up in Washington). I have only 2 first cousins who also live up in Washington. So, holidays were usually spent with the 7 of us. My three grandparents (my maternal grandfather died when I was only 7), my parents, my sister and myself. It was always great though. We shared a closeness among the 7 of us that I think many larger families miss out on somewhat. We each had our place at my parent's dining room table and we could all eat together at the same time. It was nice.

As I'm writing this, I'm thinking, okay, Renee, we didn't shrink, we EXPANDED. Now, with my sister's family of 6, mine of 5, and my mom and grandfather, we have 13. But, it still feels like we've gotten smaller. I guess because I feel so much that the three people that we lost should be here. Especially my dad, he was young and he should still be with us. Sitting with us at the dinner table. Holding his namesake, Category 5, on his lap.

But I didn't mean for this post to be a downer, and now it is. So, I'm going to count my blessings . . Mark, Anna, Emma, John M., Adele, Kelli, and so on and so on. I AM indeed blessed and sometimes writing these posts is just what I need to realize that.

9 comments:

mickeydad said...

Hey Frog,

Where y'at... Better be careful on that tractor with those pyromids.

2 of the 3 people you mentioned had long happy lives. I guess that's all you can ask for. The third should still be here, but I know he's laughing his butt off at category 5 every day.

Spikey1 said...

Damn you made me all teary. I am missing as well!

Suz said...

(((((HUGS))))) I for one am glad you did the post. It made me think about my family, who has passed but never forgotten and who is still around and how much I love/loved them all.

Love the picture. John looks like he is in aw of his paw-paw.

Hugs Suz

candyfortheteacher said...

You know I sometimes feel the same way. I don't think is that the family is smaller it's where you are in the family. You were the child to be nurtured and protected by these wonderful people and now you are the nurturer and protector. You know how a house or place fells huge as a child and small when you become an adult. I think the same thing happens when it is family. The dynamics change. My husbands sister died of kidney failure due to diabetes, before our daughter was born and we named her after his sister. That a special thing God does for us. Those name sakes help us keep the memories of our loved ones alive and fresh. Its like a little of them is in the namesake.

Cindy N. said...

Hi Renee, I understand you feelings right now.....I think we probably reminisce more at this time of year than any other. As you know, I lost my Dad 2 1/2 years ago too. I wish he was still here laughing and asking me to take his picture. Anyway, I am sorry you missed the last episode of survivor....in case you don't know....Dani won and Stephanie was 2nd place. It was interesting at the end. udd is so pissed at Stephanie! Go figure! I wanted Steph to win. She worked really hard at it.

chesneygirl said...

You ARE very blessed indeed! :)

I was very close to my grandpa and he died 7 years ago, 3 days after Christmas. Family get togethers just haven't been the same since. I miss him every single day. I wish my husband and son could have met him and could've known even just a little piece of him and vice versa.

Lovely post, Renee! :)

momyblogR said...

What a beautiful post and a fabulous reminder of how blessed we really are. Thanks!! :)

Kold_Kadavr_flatliner said...

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What you’ll find in my wonderful, fruitFULL, dynamic novel is an indelible treasure, unlike any other in the known cosmos. It’s by moi. And I’m one-of-a-kind. Not bragging, brudda. He threw away the mold. ONE o’me is plenty HeeHee If you decide to read this delicious script, get in touch with my CPA, Edward Foree, at 1-785-266-9111. Out this month. Poifect for both X-mass and/or evangelism!

GOD BLESS YOU WITH DISCERNMENT!!

BayouMaMa2 said...

Hi Renee...my heart goes out to you. I can't imagine the pain of losing a parent. Even if your faith is strong and you know your loved one is with the Lord...you can't help but miss their face. Your post was not a downer...your honesty and willingness to share your feelings is touching. Something you say here might be the very thing that moves someone to reach out to a loved one that they have lost touch with. Keep keeping it real. {Hugs!}