Tuesday, January 30, 2007
2, 9, 11
Lately, I've been noticing more and more my attempts to address the needs of my kids at the different stages they are in their lives. There's just something tricky about trying to change a poopie diaper while helping a third grader with spelling words, and listening to an 11-year old complain about not being able to talk to boys on the phone.
Can I just have one stage at a time please? I think I'd been spoiled with this. Anna and Emma are only 2 years apart and they were on the same wavelength for years. I'd take them to the zoo, they were happy. To the park, happy. To Burger King, great. Shopping, even better.
Not so much now. I find myself trying to make all three happy, or at least not miserable and sometimes failing big time. I try to get some one-on-one time with all of them, but John M. is way ahead on that game. He needs my attention most often, so he's the one that gets it.
I wonder sometimes if my girls feel slighted and I hate to admit myself that they chances are, they do. They've actually voiced them a few times but most often, don't mention it. That fact, in itself, makes me love them all the more and feel guilty all the more too. I suppose I have to look at it in the way that the 1-on-1 attention that they receive is directly proportionate to what they require. You get me? I'm not sure I do either. But what I'm thinking is that, for the most part, they seem to be content to be playing with friends, or on the computer or watching Hannah Montana on Disney for the umpteenth time, and if that's the case, so be it. Now and again, they do request my involvement in something specific, a game or homework or a project and I do my best to give them 100% when I can. I hope that's good enough. That I'm not doing any harm.
My absolute favorite times are when things just seem to fall into place by themselves. Like when they all end up in the kitchen doing cheers that they've taught John, that involve Anna (or Emma) yelling 'Big Sis!' and him coming back with 'Little Bro!' and then lots of laughing.
Those are the best. I hope there's loads more of those to come.